The Righteous, Behaving Badly – Frequently

Turns out there’s a wikipedia page featuring a list of high-profile evangelist scandals as far back as the 1920s. It’s a fascinating collection of felonies, rank hypocrisy, con artistry, extramarital affairs, and sexual misconduct. How is it that so many people continue to put their trust in men and women like these in the face of so much evidence that so many of them are nothing but two-bit crooks gone big-time?

Could it be related to the same lack of reasoning that led them to accept the invisible sky fairy to begin with?

This Week In Fundamentalism, Volume 2

The folks behind Expelled are still in defensive mode this week, screaming all the while of course that those who claim they’ve plagiarized from both educational sources and PBS are simply trying to silence them because they’re speaking out against the dogma that is evolution. Apparently Yoko Ono and the band The Killers have also had their copyrights violated. I suppose it’s not enough to interview scientists under false pretenses to promote a nonsense non-theory in a movie peppered with images of the Third Reich; no, when you’re lying for Jesus, it’s best o go all-out.

(By the way, the link to Expelled above actually goes to the Expelled Exposed website, because links to this counter-site will help to raise its ranking in search engine results for the term Expelled.)

James Dobson’s American Family Association is trying to get Marriot hotels to drop the portion of their in-room pay-per-view movie service that includes adult fare. One would assume their thinly veiled boycott threat does not apply to depictions of the biblically mandated act of lesbian love.

The right-wing punditry over at Townhall.com are a wonderful source of stupidity to draw upon; even on otherwise quiet weeks I’m sure I’ll have no trouble finding some perverse statement over there to ponder in this series of posts.

This week’s Townhall Special Friends are Michael “War on Penguins” Medved and our old buddy, Dinesh Confuz’da.

Medved points out rightly that at no time in the foreseeable future will an atheist be elected president in this country. Well… duh. He seems to think an atheist wouldn’t be cut out for the job, though. Says the Penguiphobe:

As Constitutional scholars all point out, the Presidency uniquely combines the two functions of head of government (like the British Prime Minister) and head of state (like the Queen of England). POTUS not only appoints cabinet members and shapes foreign policy and delivers addresses to Congress, but also presides over solemn and ceremonial occasions.

For instance, try to imagine an atheist president issuing the annual Thanksgiving proclamation. To whom would he extend thanks in the name of his grateful nation –-the Indians in Massachusetts?

I suppose he could thank the Indians, but I imagine some of them might be just a tad bitter about the destruction of their civilization by those loving Christian settlers. A better choice might be the farmers who grew or raised the food folks around the nation are about to devour, or to the folks throughout history who have made the agricultural advances that allow us to live in such abundance. How about thanking the framers of the constitution, who had the forethought to create a secular nation where people are free to celebrate the Thanksgiving tradition (or not to) according to their own customs? How about thanks to the men and women who have died over the years fighting to preserve the rights laid out in that document? Any of these seem more profound and meaningful to me than a simple “Praise Jesus!”

Then there’s the significant matter of the Pledge of Allegiance. Would President Atheist pronounce the controversial words “under God”? … Moreover, what patriotic songs would our non-believer chief executive authorize for major celebrations and observances? “God Bless America” is out, obviously, as is “America the Beautiful” (with its chorus, “America, America, God Shed His Grace on Thee.”) “My Country ‘tis of Thee” features an altogether unacceptable last verse (“Our father’s God to thee/Author of Liberty/To Thee we sing…”) and “The Star Spangled Banner” national anthem also concludes with a verse that could cause hives to the ACLU (“Then conquer we must when our cause it is just/And this be our motto: In God is Our Trust.”)

Does Medved really think the ability to sing patriotic songs is an important qualification for a presidential candidate? Does he think it’s impossible to appreciate the intention of a song without picking it apart line by line? (I mean, really, what would have become of Everybody Wang Chung Tonight if people had delved too far into the meaning of the lyrics?) Does he cling to the mistaken idea that the “under God” in the pledge of allegiance was anything but an overreaction to the Red Scare?

The notion of dropping or altering all references to God and faith on public occasions to avoid discomfort for a single individual amounts to a formula for a disastrously unpopular presidency.

A better formula for a disastrously unpopular presidency would be one where the nation is successfully attacked by terrorists, plunged into an unjustified, poorly executed war, spied on by its government, implicated in torture, its currency devalued, its economy in freefall. Good thing people like Medved are around to convince voters to opt for at least another four years of the McSame.

There’s a difference between an atheist, however, and a Mormon or a Jew – despite the fact that the same U.S. population (about five million) claims membership in each of the three groups. For Mitt and Joe, their religious affiliation reflected their heritage and demonstrated their preference for a faith tradition differing from larger Christian denominations. But embrace of Jewish or Mormon practices doesn’t show contempt for the Protestant or Catholic faith of the majority, but affirmation of atheism does.

Unfortunately most of America subscribes to this theory – believing in any fairy tale is better than believing in none.

Atheism itself shows contempt for no one; contempt for unreasoning beliefs, perhaps, but not necessarily for the people who embrace them. I certainly can’t speak for all atheists, but personally I strongly support your right to believe what you want – but I won’t join you in the beliefs themselves, nor in your presumed right to push them or their consequences onto everyone else.

Winning the War on Islamo-Nazism.

What the hell is Islamo-Nazism? Has our national dialogue been so dumbed down that we can justify anything by claiming that damned Osama bin Hitler will win if we don’t all line up to support the republican party line?

Our enemies insist that God plays the central role in the current war and that they affirm and defend him, while we reject and ignore him. The proper response to such assertions involves the citation of our religious traditions and commitments, and the credible argument that embrace of modernity, tolerance and democracy need not lead to godless materialism.

Yes, because those Islamo-Nazis will rush to embrace us if we all take up Christianity or Judaism.

The charge that our battle amounts to a “war against Islam” seems more persuasive when an openly identified non-believer leads our side—after all, President Atheist says he believes in nothing, so it’s easy to assume that he leads a war against belief itself. A conventional adherent of Judeo-Christian faith can, on the other hand, make the case that our fight constitutes of an effort to defend our own way of life, not a war to suppress some alternative – and that way of life includes a specific sort of free-wheeling, open-minded religiosity that has blessed this nation and could also bless the nations of the Middle East.

There again is the assumption that a lack of belief in the supernatural amounts to a desire for the systematic suppression of religion. While there are probably more than a few atheists who wouldn’t be bothered by such actions (just as there are some religious folks who have openly called for atheists to have stamps on their foreheads to identify them as less than human), the vast majority of US atheists I’ve encountered simply want to be able to live here without feeling the need to hide that fact that they don’t subscribe to any particular mythology.

And now we come to the latest screed by Dinesh, He-Whose-Name-Is-So-Easy-To-D’stort-That-I-Can’t-Help-Myself. He begins by whining that evolution is “taught in an atheistic way” in public schools, citing several books and essays containing passages pointing out the fact that the evidence for evolution damages the credibility of religious theories of our origin. One of the books he mentions is, he says, is “widely assigned”, but no data is provided on what level of circulation any of these books have. (To be fair, I’ve not read Mr. D’souza’s latest book, from which he draws these examples, and it’s entirely possible he provides more detailed information there.) I do know that during all my years at public schools in the 70s and 80s, never once was I assigned a textbook that took a specific stance one way or the other on the existence of God. Never once in college (where I spent 11 years, mostly part-time while working to pay for it) was I exposed to any mention, positive or negative, except in philosophy and literature courses where the topic was relevant and where it was addresses in an even-handed way.

But let’s just accept for purposes of this discussion the idea that those biology textbooks are just brimming with great oozing masses of atheistic immorality (and ignore the possibility that they may often simply be perceived that way because evolution itself represents such a strong argument against God).

Law suits, Dinesh says, are just the thing to solve this problem of rampant government-approved non-belief. I disagree: I think the textbook makers should voluntarily pull such authors’ opinions from the books – keeping millions of their and the school districts’ dollars from being handed over to lawyers. Why? Because the act of learning about evolution and the development of the reasoning skills used to understand the theory are far superior tools for breaking free from religion’s grasp than any personal opinion from any scientist could ever hope to be.

Schools would be on notice that they cannot use scientific facts to draw metaphysical conclusions in favor of atheism.

Atheism denies the metaphysical. Scientific facts are used to draw scientific conclusions about atheism. Deal with it.

In this way Darwinism in the public schools would no longer be a threat to religion in general or Christianity in particular.

If by “Darwinism” you mean the theory of evolution and the scientific method attendant to it, then these will always be a threat to religion, because they will always represent a better way to understand the world than “invisible sky-daddy told me so!”

Blessed are the Lesbians

“You shall not lie with a male as with a woman: it is an abomination.”

That line from Leviticus is the one most frequently referenced by Christians to justify their opposition (in various forms) to homosexuality. It came up in a discussion over on the Richard Dawkins forums recently, and inspired me to dig into that sentence a little, try to understand what it’s really trying to say.

I was shocked, I tell you, absolutely shocked at what I discovered. But it’s all so clear now.

You shall not lie with a male as with a woman: it is an abomination.”

You, in this case, is not explicitly specified, so it has to be assumed that you refers to the reader, which could be a man or a woman (unless of course women shouldn’t be able to read… and while misogyny isn’t specifically a sin, we all know that the loving Christian God would never lower himself to such assumptions, right?) So for each reader of this rule, there are a limited number of possibilities:

  • The reader is male, in which case he clearly can’t lie with another male
  • The reader is female, in which case she clearly can’t lie with a male (read the passage again – it says so!) By logical extension, then, any sexual contact between male and female is also an abomination.

If the reader is female, Leviticus does not, however, impose any limits on your lying with another woman. Conclusion:

God loves him some hot girl-on-girl action.

I know it’s hard to believe, but once you accept lesbianism as a holy institution, so many mysteries are unraveled!

The male-dominated priesthood takes vows of chastity because all male-female sexual contact is sinful!

Why do so many women become nuns? Just what do you think they’re talking about when they mention “doing their devotionals”? Come on, admit it – how many nuns have you seen who didn’t look like stereotypical butch lesbians? And those vows of silence they sometimes take? Those are just excuses not to talk because their tongues are so tired.

The bible goes on to say: “And you shall not lie with any beast and defile yourself with it, neither shall any woman give herself to a beast to lie with it: it is perversion.”

Sorry, ladies, I’m afraid that means the oversized battery powered contraption you’ve nicknamed “The Beast” will have to go. God says so.

How could I forget this one?

It seems that there was no coffee in my system yesterday when I posted my inaugural “This Week In Fundamentalism”, because I hit ‘Save’ and went to bed without addressing the actual big story of the week!

Say you’re an extra-fervent member of the sect called Mormonism of the cult called Christianity. Say the good Lord has blessed you with a strong hankerin’ for the righteous boinkin’ of some underaged skirt goodies, but there’s a pesky little thing called “the law” that infringes on your holy mission to put women in their place.

What to do? Well, perhaps if you get together with some like-minded friends, you can buy 1700 acres in Texas and build a compound where you and your community of properly submissive women can till the soil and live apart from society until the end of the world (which is coming very, very soon now, Praise His Glorious Holy Destructiveness, Hallelujah!)

This was exactly the plan acted out by a group of Mormons near Eldorado, Texas. Problem is, that state, while packed with more than its share of whacko fundies, happens to be packed mostly with a different kind of whacko fundie, and those folks don’t take kindly to anyone hornin’ in on their racket (which involves fewer of the “weaker sex” assigned to submit to a given male leader at a time). So when the authorities got a call from one of the girls on the compound who accused an older man of forcing her into marriage and impregnating her at age 15, they sprang into action, raided the compound, and … arrested one person, against whom they may or may not be able to press charges.

On a side note, while I love my wife and enjoy being married, I personally believe that polygamy would be its own punishment.

This Week In Fundamentalism, Volume 1

It seems as if every day there’s some new scandal or story of stupidity involving members of the holier-than-thou set. Except on Sundays, of course, which are their days of rest. You’d think they’d be lying low for a while after the recent national embarrassment of PZ Myers’ expulsion from Expelled! Let’s Show Pictures of Hitler (while Richard Dawkins walked right in), the subsequent attempts to make excuses for their ineptness, and most of all, the recent tragic news of the 11 year old girl who died because her fundamentalist parents thought prayer would be an effective cure for her diabetes. But no, they soldier on, almost as if they don’t understand that these stories reflect negatively on them…

As the latest of my occasional attempts to coerce myself into posting more often, I’ve titled this post “This Week In Fundamentalism, Volume 1”. The “Volume 1” part implies there will be more, and the “Week” part implies that it might appear something close to weekly. Maybe I’ll take the hint I’m dropping myself, but it’s hard to tell; sometimes I can be pretty thick-headed.

Anyway, on to the subject at hand:

I remember a story from while back about an outspoken atheist named Rob Sherman, who fought a court battle against a mandatory Moment of Silence at his daughter’s school. I was less than thrilled by this action, because there was never a mandatory prayer involved (though the word “prayer” was in the name of the act that created the MoS) and there was no indication that it would be anything other than a quiet moment when those who wanted to pray or gather their thoughts could do so. Railing against an optional, voluntary, quiet, unguided religious rite seemed to me to play right into the stereotypes religious folks have about militant atheists who want to take their rights away.

Mr. Sherman’s recent actions, however, I heartily approve of. He’s involved in the investigation of some shady dealings involving the Illinois governor’s alleged funneling of $1 million to a religious school, and it was during his testimony before a House committee on April 2nd that he was verbally assaulted by a legislator:

Davis: I don’t know what you have against God, but some of us don’t have much against him. We look forward to him and his blessings. And it’s really a tragedy — it’s tragic — when a person who is engaged in anything related to God, they want to fight. They want to fight prayer in school.

I don’t see you (Sherman) fighting guns in school. You know?

I’m trying to understand the philosophy that you want to spread in the state of Illinois. This is the Land of Lincoln. This is the Land of Lincoln where people believe in God, where people believe in protecting their children.… What you have to spew and spread is extremely dangerous, it’s dangerous–

Sherman: What’s dangerous, ma’am?

Davis: It’s dangerous to the progression of this state. And it’s dangerous for our children to even know that your philosophy exists! Now you will go to court to fight kids to have the opportunity to be quiet for a minute. But damn if you’ll go to [court] to fight for them to keep guns out of their hands. I am fed up! Get out of that seat!

Sherman: Thank you for sharing your perspective with me, and I’m sure that if this matter does go to court—

Davis: You have no right to be here! We believe in something. You believe in destroying! You believe in destroying what this state was built upon.

(Audio of the exchange here)

Eric Zorn, the Chicago Tribune reporter who covered the story, made an excellent point:

“Consider what the outcry would have been if a lawmaker had launched a similar attack on the beliefs of a religious person.”

I also wonder if Rep. Davis – a black woman – sees any irony in standing in front of a legislative body attempting deny a person’s rights based on his beliefs, when it wasn’t so very long ago in this country when she would very likely have been similarly shouted down when fighting for her rights in front of earlier generations of righteous bigots who would see her as an uppity negro or a woman who didn’t know her place.

I was intrigued by her repeated “Land of Lincoln” reference. Intrigued enough to see if I could find some information on Honest Abe’s thoughts on religion. The results of a quick Google search are quite interesting; there exist a large body of quotes attributed to him that seem to indicate a belief in the Christian god, but also a number of quotes that seem strong indicators that his view of the world might have been a little closer to Mr. Sherman’s than to those of the representative who invoked his name. Perhaps he presented one face publicly, knowing he needed the support of the religious community, while presenting another in private? Maybe he was simply a deist like most of the founding fathers, believing in some sort of creator but rejecting dogmatic attempts to understand that being.

My earlier views of the unsoundness of the Christian scheme of salvation and the human origin of the scriptures, have become clearer and stronger with advancing years and I see no reason for thinking I shall ever change them.

What is to be, will be, and no prayers of ours can arrest the decree.

The Bible is not my book nor Christianity my profession.

The United States government must not undertake to run the Churches. When an individual, in the Church or out of it, becomes dangerous to the public interest he must be checked.

There was the strangest combination of church influence against me. Baker is a Campbellite; and therefore, as I suppose with few exceptions, got all of that Church. My wife had some relations in the Presbyterian churches, and some in the Episcopal churches; and therefore, wherever it would tell, I was set down as either one or the other, while it was everywhere contended that no Christian ought to vote for me because I belonged to no Church, and was suspected of being a Deist and had talked of fighting a duel.

(All of the above, along with some testimonials written by people who knew Lincoln personally, are collected at PositiveAtheism.org)

And there’s this one, which seems almost prophetic these days:

America will never be destroyed from the outside. If we falter and lose our freedoms, it will be because we destroyed ourselves.

Land of Lincoln, indeed.

On the international front, the leader of the Russian doomsday cult who had his followers holed up in a cave since November awaiting the end of the world, was understandably upset when it didn’t happen. So upset, in fact, that he tried to commit suicide by beating himself on the head with a log.

In the spirit of modern American foreign policy, I suggest embarking on a policy of preemptive log-beatings to guard against this sort of behavior in the future.

At last, an evidence-based religion!

At first I just laughed at this Autoblog article:

Bow your heads: Kansas man forming Mustang Church of America

Charles Ales is into Ford Mustangs. In fact, he owns several; his collection includes all three BOSS variants and four new Shelbys. Over years of collecting cars and hobnobbing with others who share his interests, he noticed that the real car people’s enthusiasm for their rides borders on religious fervor. An idea popped into Charles’ head last summer, and The Mustang Church of America and Museum was born. It’s even got its own logo: the Christian fish symbol with the running pony inside.

Built next to the house in which he was born, the facility is set to open later this summer and will display Mr. Ales’ collection of Mustangs. He also plans to host car shows, swap meets and two Mustang blessings a year. Charles and his adopted son Robert Brunch, both ordained ministers, will preside over Sunday services in the non-denominational church. “I’ll preach goodness and helping my fellow humankind. I’ll preach what we’re supposed to do – make this a better world than we found it,” he told the local Pittsburg, KS Morning Sun newspaper.

The mural behind his pulpit will show Jesus at the wheel of a ’66 Mustang. Bet you don’t have one of those at your church.

But when I thought about it, I was struck by the fact that there is, in fact, solid and irrefutable proof for the existence of the Ford Mustang. I wish I’d seen this article a few days earlier so when I got pulled over last week I could have argued with the state trooper that I wasn’t speeding, I was engaging in a sacred religious rite, and her interference constituted a violation of my rights.

Goodbye, Arthur, and Thanks

Human judges can show mercy. But against the laws of nature, there is no appeal.
— Arthur C. Clarke

Celebrity deaths are curious things; we find ourselves grieving over the loss of someone we’ve never met, and only knew through some body of work they’ve left behind as a legacy or, in some cases, have only even heard of because they were “famous for being famous”. Usually these deaths have little effect on me; I may regret the loss of further contributions from that person, or commiserate in a detached sort of way with their families because I know what it’s like to lose a loved one. But at most there’s only a momentary pang of sadness, and then I get on with living life among the people who I do know and care about on a personal level.

Before today, only three times had the passing of someone famous had a profound impact on me, a sense that somehow the sum total of the things that are wondrous and wonderful here on our little space rock has been diminished in a way from which it will never fully recover. The first two were Jim Henson and Carl Sagan, who had tremendous influences on my childhood and adolescence. The third was, for reasons I have yet to figure out, the actor Andreas Katsulas, about whom I knew almost absolutely nothing beyond that he played a favorite character of mine on a television show (I have only a vague sort of knowledge what the guy even looked like behind the mask and makeup that turned him into G’kar).

It’s fairly well known that when Hemingway wrote “ask not for whom the bell tolls; it tolls for thee“, he was saying that the loss of one life is a loss for us all, and we are lessened by it.

Today, the bell rang out loud and clear for science fiction writer Sir Arthur C. Clarke. Best known in popular culture for the movie “2001: A Space Odyssey” and its sequels, Clarke is better remembered for the many books, stories, and articles written in his 90 years of life. His imagination has changed our world; he was the guy who, in the 1940s, came up with the crazy idea of trying to put a man-made object into orbit and bounce communication signals off it. Of the men I consider the grand masters of science fiction – Heinlein, Asimov, Herbert, Clarke, and Bradbury, all gone now save for the last – Clarke was often perhaps the most realistically visionary. By this I mean that while he could write visions of the far future with the best of them, he also excelled at showing us hints of the near tomorrows, the almost-here futures that, for better or worse, could (and often did) happen during his readers’ lifetimes.

I’d like to end with a small selection of quotes from his writing, but there are so many great ones to choose from that it’s hard to limit myself to just a few.

There is, of course, Clarke’s Third Law:

Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic.

Another favorite of mine is this one, a sentiment echoed later by Carl Sagan in his “Pale Blue Dot” monologue:

It is not easy to see how the more extreme forms of nationalism can long survive when men have seen the Earth in its true perspective as a single small globe against the stars.

On information vs. knowledge:

…it is vital to remember that information — in the sense of raw data — is not knowledge, that knowledge is not wisdom, and that wisdom is not foresight. But information is the first essential step to all of these.

He had a few thoughts on religion as well:

Perhaps our role on this planet is not to worship God — but to create Him.

I would defend the liberty of consenting adult creationists to practice whatever intellectual perversions they like in the privacy of their own homes; but it is also necessary to protect the young and innocent.

The greatest tragedy in mankind’s entire history may be the hijacking of morality by religion.

I don’t believe in God but I’m very interested in her.

When challenged to write a 10-word short story:

“God said, ‘Cancel Program GENESIS.’ The universe ceased to exist.”

On UFOs:

They tell us absolutely nothing about intelligence elsewhere in the universe, but they do prove how rare it is on Earth.

There are plenty more where those came from, but I’ll sign off with Clarke’s own words on the occasion of his 90th birthday last December:

I’m sometimes asked how I would like to be remembered. I’ve had a diverse career as a writer, underwater explorer, space promoter and science populariser. Of all these, I want to be remembered most as a writer – one who entertained readers, and, hopefully, stretched their imagination as well.

I find that another English writer — who, coincidentally, also spent most of his life in the East — has expressed it very well. So let me end with these words of Rudyard Kipling:

If I have given you delight
by aught that I have done.
Let me lie quiet in that night
which shall be yours anon;

And for the little, little span
the dead are borne in mind,
seek not to question other than,
the books I leave behind.

This is Arthur Clarke, saying Thank You and Goodbye from Colombo!

What? I have an AUDIENCE!?

Yes, it’s a momentous and humbling occasion here at drl2Blog – I’ve just discovered that at least one person outside my immediate family has actually read some of my ramblings! The WordPress software I use for this blog provides the administrator with a list of sites that have linked here, but I mostly ignore it because it’s usually just full of links from other Atheist Blogroll members where my blog magically appears on their list whether they like it or not. However, I just discovered that the otherwhirled (note trendy lower case format, common to better blogs everywhere but not quite as cool as having a single capital letter in the middle of the name!) has linked to me (voluntarily, no less)!

Of course, their description of my site uses the word “occasional” twice, and I beg to differ because if you look back at my posts it’s clear that – … hmm… well, yeah, OK, “occasional” works for me.

The problem with posting only occasionally is that when I finally feel I’ve got something worth saying, there’s already too much to cover. It’s a vicious cycle of occasionality – a word which, by the way, I just now invented and expect royalties on.

The Blog Against Theocracy is coming again this year over Easter weekend. Last year I said I would write something for it, but never quite got around to it. This year I absolutely promise to at the very least find new and different reasons for not getting to it. Or maybe I’ll actually write something. Who knows?

A couple of sites I’ve recently discovered that I thought I’d pass along:

Coming Out Godless is for people who have left their faith to talk about the experience, and Reason vs. Faith is a site for moderated debate between theists and atheists. I know which side I’m rooting for.

My wedding anniversary is this Sunday and for the first time in a long while my wife and I will have the house to ourselves for a few hours. Susan seems to have a few specific ideas on how to spend the time, but it might be tough to get me in the mood because I’m so used to foreplay beginning with those five magical words, “Aren’t the kids asleep yet!?”

Which would you rather have as a neighbor?

After posting my earlier entry, it occurred to me that I could expand much more on my response to the items involving our genetic relationship to the great apes. In that vein, I present my first-ever Top Ten List:

Top 10 Reasons Why Apes Are Better Than Creationists

  • 10. To a chimpanzee, a banana is just a banana.
  • 9. Monkeys hang onto tree limbs with their heads upside down. Creationists hang onto dogma with their heads in the sand.
  • 8. Two words: DUNG FIIIIGHT!
  • 7. Gorillas don’t knock on your door early Saturday mornings to hand out pamphlets about the Invisible Sky Chimp.
  • 6. No Orang-utan has ever left a comic strip about sinners going to hell in any public rest room or waiting room.
  • 5. Bonobos get to stay home on Sundays.
  • 4. Hands already hairy so no danger from masturbation.
  • 3. Monkeys are repressing religious people and waging a WAR ON CHRISTMAS!
  • 2. Chimps not terrified of the vagina.
  • And the number one reason why apes are better than creationists:


    No ape has ever stood over a fallen foe and screamed, “Die, in the name of God!”