Which would you rather have as a neighbor?

After posting my earlier entry, it occurred to me that I could expand much more on my response to the items involving our genetic relationship to the great apes. In that vein, I present my first-ever Top Ten List:

Top 10 Reasons Why Apes Are Better Than Creationists

• 10. To a chimpanzee, a banana is just a banana.
• 9. Monkeys hang onto tree limbs with their heads upside down. Creationists hang onto dogma with their heads in the sand.
• 8. Two words: DUNG FIIIIGHT!
• 7. Gorillas don’t knock on your door early Saturday mornings to hand out pamphlets about the Invisible Sky Chimp.
• 6. No Orang-utan has ever left a comic strip about sinners going to hell in any public rest room or waiting room.
• 5. Bonobos get to stay home on Sundays.
• 4. Hands already hairy so no danger from masturbation.
• 3. Monkeys are repressing religious people and waging a WAR ON CHRISTMAS!
• 2. Chimps not terrified of the vagina.
• And the number one reason why apes are better than creationists:
  …
  …
  No ape has ever stood over a fallen foe and screamed, “Die, in the name of God!”